Monday, January 3, 2011

The Powerful Woman's Fatal Flaw

Powerful Women have a major life-altering flaw. 
They get what they want. 

Everyone's dream?  Maybe.  Anyone's path to self-fulfillment?  Never.  A terrible albatross, it breathes life into the expression power corrupts.

Desires are healthy.  They move us through life, a meandering journey of experiences that shape us.  Healthy desires give us the guidance that allows us to recognize when opportunities present themselves.  But beware the power to make them happen at will.  We think we know what will make us happy and when.  When we use our will to control timing, we fail miserably.

Let's take, for example, the Powerful Woman who chooses a man.  Simple choice.  After all, she makes things happen at will on a daily basis, surely finding the right one is as simple as intentional power.  She chooses and the quest begins.  She changes herself to make the fit.  She makes huge compromises on the very principles that were once critically important to her.  She leaves friends in the wake who watch her small tornado of effort skeptically, wondering where the girl they loved went.

The changes bring temporary gratification. But the small gains of the moment, a series of getting what she wants for that day, week, or month prolong an inevitable discovery, a simple basic truth:  when you have to work that hard at making something happen, it isn't meant to be.  But, of course, a power addict refuses to accept that something isn't meant to be.  Isn't everything simply one act of will away?

The irony of desire is that the more it's fed, the greater it grows.  Just like love, which grows by fulfilled obligation, commitment, and faithful attention, desire grows with each committed and intentional act to get what you want. What a curse to be just successful enough to keep the perception of control alive.  When the crash happens, it happens hard.  For by that time, the object of desire is bigger than life, given far more credit and merit than deserved, and leaves a proportionately large, gaping hole when the floor falls out from beneath. Is it the loss of the object that sends her to the sanitarium? No.  That kind of craving rarely brings any happiness to miss. It is the birth and death, euphoria and despair, of a desire that captured measureless energy and obsession.  The sad truth: she really just took on a battle against herself...and lost.  

Now, all that is left is a simple submissive admission.

The Powerful Woman doesn't always get what she wants in the end.  Nor should she.

Step back and relinquish control sometimes. The best things in life are a gift, not a quest.

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